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    CAUSTIC CAPRICORN...

    Go Back  The Irksome Journeys of September 2003    Go Forward
    Greetings, depressing goatish types! How are the children of tragic Saturn this month? Still doing well, I trust, from the rapid shift of fortune last time! But fear not, lugubrious ones! The good times can't last, as the vile and bitter prognostications for savage September now reveal.

    As Venus the goddess clashes with powerful Pluto your profits are high, but lawsuits are now being lodged against the onslaught of your reality television and 'pay to get out' toilet blocks. Most of these relate to health matters, irritable bowel or irritable bowel owner being the predominant issues, though there are several burst bladders among the listings. Retrograde Mars clashes with jolly Jupiter and nasty crowds gather outside your offices, muttering and stamping nastily. Associates and in-laws question the ethic of your doings, but you simply offer them high-paying jobs to allay any moral misgivings.

    Come the Full Moon in snivelling Pisces, the mood turns nastier still. Pickets surround your offices. There are assaults on staff and dark doings in the toilet blocks, in places not set aside for the purpose of dark doings, much to the dismay of the cleaning staff. As Chiron the wounded healer in your sign clashes with sober Saturn, associates and partners murmur about your greed and intolerable self-interest. They sneer hurtfully, cutting you to the quick. But then, you've had cut quicks before, as this is the way your nearest and dearest always talk about you until they want something. Then, it's another story, isn't it! Oh yes! So, you take out your little black book, make a note of the remark, the person involved and the time and date for future reference.

    Revolutionary Uranus moves back to eccentric Aquarius while Venus the goddess moves into Libra. Financial pressures begin pressing! You have to negotiate with people as though you're genuinely willing to compromise. Mercury the messenger goes direct and you wonder why you started this, but as the great Sol Invicti enters Libra, bringing a New Moon in that asinine sign, you remember. It was to succeed and make money. The only problem is that people hate you for doing so. Thus, you conceive a cunning plan. You'll hire someone to teach you to be nice! So nice, in fact, that people will agree with everything you say, do everything you ask and end by thanking you for exploiting them, grateful that it's you who profits from their labour.

    As mighty Mars moves direct and Mercury the messenger once more squares underworld Pluto, you put this plan into action. Click here next month and see what happens, little goatish tragedies!


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    Aries, the Ram
    Aries, the Ram

    Taurus, the Bull
    Taurus, the Bull

    Gemini, the Twins
    Gemini, the Twins

    Cancer, the Crab
    Cancer, the Crab

    Leo, the Lion
    Leo, the Lion

    Virgo, the Virgin
    Virgo, the Virgin

    Libra, the Scales
    Libra, the Scales

    Scorpio, the Scorpion
    Scorpio, the Scorpion

    Sagittarius, the Archer
    Sagittarius, the Archer

    Capricorn, the Sea Goat
    Capricorn, the Sea Goat

    Aquarius, the Water Bearer
    Aquarius, the Water Bearer

    Pisces, the Fishes
    Pisces, the Fishes

     
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