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    Asperitus Casting Runes

    Asperitus Casting Runes...

    Nhill, holy city

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    GRUESOME GEMINI...

    Go Back  The Irksome Journeys of June 2003    Go Forward
    Salutations, air sign twits! Have you got your ticket to ride on the concord of my vile and bitter prognostications for jaundiced June? Then all aboard, little loquacious ninnies, and we will soar to the heights of sublime irritation once again.

    We left you last month in an insensate state, having experienced a complete mental blackout due to the eclipse rather than to your usual overdose of cafe latte and addle-pate conversation. You wander distractedly, trying desperately to recall who you are despite the fact that the rest of us are happy to forget.

    Mighty Mars clashes with Venus the goddess and a band of wandering flagellants decide to improve their skills on your body and then heave you into a creek. You lapse into unconsciousness, but then your life changes as giant Jupiter and mystic Neptune wrestle in the Heavens while sober Saturn enters Cancer and your solar second house of money. God speaks to you! Why the deity should believe He has this kind of time to waste, I have no idea, but then stranger things have happened in the past. For instance, He permitted Adam and Eve to breed in the first place and then sent an angel to warn Noah about the deluge so the pitiful human race would survive. Mysterious are the ways of the lord indeed!

    While the entire conversation is too long to recount, as words with the deity rarely err on the side of brevity, I shall give you the gist of it here. He tells you to give up your idiot ways, get a decent job and look after your family and also to give up wearing those colourful clothes that are odious in his sight. If you do so, your sense (inasmuch as you ever possessed any) will be restored to you. You agree.

    As a raft of tedious planets enter your sign at the Full Moon in Sagittarius, we find you labouring in some laudable profession that contributes to the wellbeing of humanity and married to a hard-working foreign person who feels privileged to be a member of the human community (oh god!). As mighty Mars clashes with the Lunar Nodes, you split with old friends and begin attending church. Mighty Mars moves into Pisces and you become the leader of a religious group that directs 'at-risk' persons towards useful work.

    But then everything changes as mighty Mars conjoins with Uranus, Mercury opposes Pluto and sober Saturn conjoins with the Sun in that depressing way he has. You set the at-risk folk to work in an offshore munitions factory. For those that refuse, you negotiate with a seedy foreign individual to sell them into slavery overseas. You buy the church you worship in and begin to tithe the incomes of all those that attend it.

    Come the New Moon in Cancer, you're back to making real money, having forgotten about your conversation with the Lord. But, little airhead twerps, has the Lord forgotten you? Click here next month and see.


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    Click here to go to Pisces Click here to go to Aquarius Click here to go to Capricorn Click here to go to Sagittarius Click here to go to Scorpio Click here to go to Libra Click here to go to Virgo Click here to go to Leo Click here to go to Cancer Click here to go to Gemini Click here to go to Taurus Click here to go to Aries


    Aries, the Ram
    Aries, the Ram

    Taurus, the Bull
    Taurus, the Bull

    Gemini, the Twins
    Gemini, the Twins

    Cancer, the Crab
    Cancer, the Crab

    Leo, the Lion
    Leo, the Lion

    Virgo, the Virgin
    Virgo, the Virgin

    Libra, the Scales
    Libra, the Scales

    Scorpio, the Scorpion
    Scorpio, the Scorpion

    Sagittarius, the Archer
    Sagittarius, the Archer

    Capricorn, the Sea Goat
    Capricorn, the Sea Goat

    Aquarius, the Water Bearer
    Aquarius, the Water Bearer

    Pisces, the Fishes
    Pisces, the Fishes

     
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