Hideous planets fart and fume in addlepate Aries, making you ill or turning your working life into a kind of hell. As a New Moon comes in the nasty sign of the Ram, you'll think about murdering everyone you work with but then decide the body bags will be too expensive and so you just change your job. You realize this behaviour isn't normal and begin to wonder if everything they say about your odious sign is true.
The great Sol Invicti rolls drunkenly into cloddish Taurus and you meet someone who falls in love with you instantly, blinded by your ghastly magnetism. As the Full Moon comes in your appalling sign, you'll realize this relationship can't go very far due to the peculiar way you behave at home and the fact that you have your parents chained up in the cellar. Thus, you have as much sex as you can get and appropriate their credit card numbers.
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