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    CRABBY CANCER...

    Go Back  The Irksome Journeys of March 2003    Go Forward
    Salutations, my vacuous little sea creatures! We left you last month talking to yourselves in an economical but nonetheless determined effort to cure your neuroses. There are other definitions of futility but this will doubtless serve for the moment. Enough of that! Let us get on with the bitter truth for miserable March.

    A New Moon comes in tragic Pisces and your solar ninth house so you begin eating at a foreign restaurant down the road to convince yourself you have expanded your xenophobic horizons. Mercury the messenger conjoins with revolutionary Uranus. You find yourself drawn to the hubbub of exotic conversation and the aroma of spicy food, spending far more than is practical or wise. Mighty Mars moves into Capricorn and your solar seventh house. You find yourself fighting with family over your massive credit card bill, but strangely drawn to a mysterious waiter at the restaurant. Great Heavens, little crustaceans! You're obsessed and eating there every day! Venus the goddess moves into Aquarius and your solar eighth house and this mysterious personage offers you an occult reading where she/he predicts you will travel to a far land, seeking a new life. She/he offers to join you, as the aforementioned land turns out to be her/his native soil.

    Revolutionary Uranus moves into Pisces as the great Sol Invicti clashes with underworld Pluto. You fight with in-laws and plant explosives in their garden gnome collection. Venus the goddess conjoins with mystic Neptune and you sell up all you have and prepare to travel overseas. As a raft of indescribably tedious aspects clatter in the heavens, you lie to everyone about your plans and suffer a multitude of small illness and attacks from hidden enemies. However, by the Full Moon in Virgo and your solar third house, you depart with your newfound love and go into the import/export business or publishing or driving taxis. As the great Sol Invicti and Mercury the messenger move into Aries and your solar tenth house, you are successful beyond your wildest dreams and become a person of note, giving a true indication as to the nature of the backwater where you have settled. Click here next month, little nonentities from the tidal pool of life and see what happens next.


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    Aries, the Ram
    Aries, the Ram

    Taurus, the Bull
    Taurus, the Bull

    Gemini, the Twins
    Gemini, the Twins

    Cancer, the Crab
    Cancer, the Crab

    Leo, the Lion
    Leo, the Lion

    Virgo, the Virgin
    Virgo, the Virgin

    Libra, the Scales
    Libra, the Scales

    Scorpio, the Scorpion
    Scorpio, the Scorpion

    Sagittarius, the Archer
    Sagittarius, the Archer

    Capricorn, the Sea Goat
    Capricorn, the Sea Goat

    Aquarius, the Water Bearer
    Aquarius, the Water Bearer

    Pisces, the Fishes
    Pisces, the Fishes

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