Asperitus Casting Runes...
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Hola to the authors of asinine twaddle! Hola to the nitwits of the air sign persuasion! We left you last month insensate, our preferred option for you, if not yours. You're about to end a journey in the place where it began so many moons ago. Why wait then, little airhead cretins? Let us leap into the vile and bitter prognostications for savage September.
As marauding Mars and eccentric Uranus cavort in an unseemly manner for the first weeks of the month, you're a sight to behold as delirium possesses you, you sick and sorry two-faced nonentities. You rave, froth, foam, twitter and dance eccentrically. You fall into fits, funks and finally (mercifully) extended dead faints. You split with a business associate and become the subject of litigation. You're visited by a wandering priest and row with family members (while conscious). All this takes place under the auspices of a raft of indescribable aspects between tedious planets. This culminates in confinement to your bedroom as an unfit person by the time of the Full Moon in snivelling Pisces.
As Chiron the wounded healer clashes with sober Saturn, an elderly person is appointed to manage your affairs (fiscal in nature) till you recover. As odious Uranus moves back to eccentric Aquarius, you have evangelistic visions while twitching violently. As Venus the goddess moves into Libra, a beautiful person is hired to minister to you and wipe your fevered brow. When Mercury the messenger moves forwards, you begin to talk in your sleep while official persons take notes at your bedside in the hope of finding incriminating statements among your ravings.
As the great Sol Invicti moves into Libra, bringing the Full Moon in that asinine sign, you wake, take food again and fall in love with your nurse. Mighty Mars moves forward and you realize your career is in tatters because of your malady, yet you remember little of what has occurred. However, you receive a potent reminder of same as Mercury the messenger clashes for a third and last time with underworld Pluto and the minions of both law and religion arrive at your home, wanting an account and, indeed, a reckoning for past peccadilloes. Ye gods, little two-faced nitwits! They've finally caught up with you! What will happen now? Click here next month and see!
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Aries, the Ram
Taurus, the Bull
Gemini, the Twins
Cancer, the Crab
Leo, the Lion
Virgo, the Virgin
Libra, the Scales
Scorpio, the Scorpion
Sagittarius, the Archer
Capricorn, the Sea Goat
Aquarius, the Water Bearer
Pisces, the Fishes
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