
Asperitus Casting Runes...
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It must be galling to have people always going on about your ego, your vanity and the absurd level of attention that you give to hair care. Apart from the fact that it's all true, it does seem moderately unfair, given that you're all so incredibly oversensitive and take offence at the slightest insult. Anyway, that's neither here nor there as my spiritual mission in this life is to give as much offence, pertinent and impertinent, as I can manage in my own long-winded and convoluted way. In this, little lions, you're treated no differently than the rest of the aggravating zodiac beasts, as any quick perusal of my monthly messages to them will reveal. But such a thing may be deemed to be insulting in itself! Imagine being treated no differently than a wet-brained Pisces or one of those aggravatingly analytical Virgos! Perhaps I should single you out for the worst of all insults, just so that you can prove your mettle! And perhaps this month you'll have the chance to show you're made of sterner stuff than hairdressers and their overpriced and ineffective products, little lions, for changes are afoot in the passage of your prideful lives.
You may stutter into the month of July with a tinge of ill feeling over last month's affair and that fact that no new hair-stylist can be found. Matters of work and partnership may be troublesome! There will be niggling issues all the way to the FULL MOON in Capricorn and your solar sixth house, bringing a lunar eclipse. Health may suffer as your hair inexplicably loses body while co-workers laugh and call you names. When giant Jupiter, monarch of the Heavens conjoins with Mercury the messenger in Gemini and your solar eleventh house, you organize a busload of friends to come around to your office and beat up all of those who have given you offence. But, as Jupiter and Mercury then swan off into Cancer and your solar twelfth house, the bus gets diverted down a new underpass and ends up going on an excursion to the seaside. All your friends have a much better time down there and aren't even sorry that they didn't turn up to help you out.
When Venus the goddess conjoins with Saturn, lord of fateful reward in Gemini, you decide to hold a great big party and not invite anyone at all, just so everyone will feel left out. It's not until Mercury the messenger makes heavenly mayhem with revolutionary Uranus and mystic Neptune on July 18th that you realize the fatal flaw in your plan. If you have to think about this last sentence then stop reading now!
When mighty Mars goes direct in Sagittarius and your solar fifth house, you decide to race overseas and find a whole new group of foreign persons to have fun with so that you can send slighting postcards and emails to those ungrateful wretches back home. However, your airline crew puts you down on a tiny pacific atoll because they can't stand the way you order them about. By the time of the NEW MOON in Cancer and your solar twelfth house, you find you're to be stranded there indefinitely because of a political coup on a neighbouring island.
When the great Sol Invicti moves into your sign, you declare yourself monarch of an independent nation state (you've established this position by shouting at all the smaller creatures who live there, you know, like animals and birds since there aren't any people). As Mercury the messenger moves into your sign, you decide to stay there sulking for the rest of your life rather than admit you've done something stupid again because of vanity and foolish pride. That salt air will be murder for your hair, little lions, but at least you'll be out of ours.
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 Aries, the Ram
 Taurus, the Bull
 Gemini, the Twins
 Cancer, the Crab
 Leo, the Lion
 Virgo, the Virgin
 Libra, the Scales
 Scorpio, the Scorpion
 Sagittarius, the Archer
 Capricorn, the Sea Goat
 Aquarius, the Water Bearer
 Pisces, the Fishes
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