Asperitus Casting Runes...
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Auld lang syne and all that, little fish-faced miseries! Last month, you were on a mission to find yourself, quite the reverse of what the rest of us were hoping you would do but there you are! As I remember it, we left you in a Thracian cave where an assault by yourself on a horned monster (with mighty Mars in Pisces, you're a little aggressive at the moment) became an assault on your senses as you surrendered to a sublime sexual transport with this beast. After days of passion in a dark place with a mysterious creature (the story of your life really), the great Sol Invicti and Venus the goddess wrestle with giant Jupiter, revealing all. The mysterious creature is none other than the Thracian shepherd who has been your guide on this shamanic voyage. And the bestial disguise she/he is wearing turns out to be part of an ancient Thracian ritual of facing one's fears, embodied in the form of a violent and lustful beast. As this reminds you of so many of your previous marriages and extra-curricular relationships, you fall in love.
As Mercury the messenger moves into Aquarius and your solar twelfth house, conjoining with mystic Neptune, the two of you decide to go into business together conducting these journeys of the spirit deep in the caves of Thrace. You also decide to hire a film crew and a production studio so that you can make videos of the shamanic voyages and sell them to the well-heeled imbeciles who have nothing better to do with their money.
As the NEW MOON comes in Capricorn and your solar eleventh house, this idyllic new life goes into operation and all seems to be well. However, as mighty Mars then makes tension with the Lunar Nodes, a strange spirit of disharmony enters the arena. Clients begin to emerge from the caves, distressed and hysterical, not seeming to have found themselves at all. As Mercury then turns retrograde, confusion becomes the order of the day and, as you try to find out what's going wrong, no one seems to understand what you're saying. Actually, this has always been the case. It's just that this time, you notice it. The film crew begins to mutter darkly about wages and conditions. As an endless stream of tedious planets then drifts into Aquarius and your solar twelfth house, the caves become populated with strange and ghastly apparitions of all kinds. They're blood-covered, half-bestial and howling fit to wake the dead. However, as mighty Mars is established in Aries and your solar second house, you're making plenty of money. In fact, people are flocking to the caves, as they seem to enjoy being scared out of their minds in the cause of a half-wit spiritual search such as only you could concoct. So, you decide simply to relax and enjoy things, as it's not often that anything you do is successful.
But what's this? As the FULL MOON comes in odious Leo, opposing Mercury, the great Sol Invicti, mystic Neptune and Venus the goddess, all in Aquarius, you're struck by startling revelations. As you're wandering deep in the caves, listening to the howlings of the haunters of this grim dark underworld, you happen across your own sweet love, the Thracian shepherd, apparently deep in sexual congress with one of the bestial spooks. Great Heavens, little fish-faces! How can this be? Are you to be betrayed yet again, in the midst of success? Emotions run riot within your tortured breast. Torment racks your body and you fall to the hard stone floor of the caves in a dead faint. Let's see if you wake up in a month. I may not be able to.
TIP FOR 2002: As sober Saturn and underworld Pluto resume their heavenly wrestling contest in May, you will either turn your home into a refuge for elderly people or assault a powerful political figure while in a state of depression. Then, when giant Jupiter moves into Leo and your solar sixth house, you will either write a Thracian rock opera that will be a moderate success in Thrace or find that you now suffer from heartburn as well as the catalogue of all your other ailments.
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Aries, the Ram
Taurus, the Bull
Gemini, the Twins
Cancer, the Crab
Leo, the Lion
Virgo, the Virgin
Libra, the Scales
Scorpio, the Scorpion
Sagittarius, the Archer
Capricorn, the Sea Goat
Aquarius, the Water Bearer
Pisces, the Fishes
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