Asperitus Casting Runes...
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What ho to you, centaur galoots! You'll know immediately from that cheery and respectful greeting that I haven't changed at all! But then neither have you, I'll be bound! So, why waste time with meaningless pleasantries? Let us fly instead through the skies of my vile and bitter prognostications for ominous October!
Last month we left you looking for a new house and a job in whatever order you can find them after deciding to leave home because of a family row. You can't find a job (because you actually have to look for one!) but you decide to move out anyway. The great Sol Invicti clashes with sober Saturn and cranky Chiron and you move in with a couple you know, one of whom is an old friend. You borrow money from them because you're too lazy to work. Mercury enters Libra and you invite other friends to stay now you have a home of your own (someone else's actually). Venus the goddess moves into Scorpio and your solar twelfth house. You start an affair with your friend's partner because you're bored and you like the way she/he looks as you accidentally walk into the bathroom while she/he is in the shower for the umpteenth time in the first few days of your inhabitation.
The Full Moon comes in odious Aries and you organize a party with even more of your friends, and some of your friends' friends. They stand about saying what a nice new house you have for twenty minutes before they start taking drugs, getting drunk and having sex, all with the stereo up loud. Mercury the messenger then clashes with cranky Chiron and sober Saturn and you have a furious row with your friend when everyone has finally gone home after the party. You scream at each other over the money you owe and the affair with her/his partner. She/he threatens to call the police if you don't get out, so you storm off and spend the night in a homeless shelter. You meet really interesting people there who ply you with drink and drugs and try to borrow money from you, to the endless amusement of all of us here in Heaven.
The great Sol Invicti and Mercury the messenger enter gloomy Scorpio, bringing a New Moon in that insufferable sign. You decide to become an itinerant, moving from shelter to shelter, living the free life of vagabond and wayfarer. You'll wear a jolly grin, tinged with a shadow of sadness, as of troubles long past and wisdom learned thereby. You'll have a piercing gaze and a devil-may-care attitude. However, sober Saturn moves into retrograde phase and the company that sacked you rings on your cell phone, offering you your job back as they're short-staffed. You give up all ideas of a wayfarer's life and go back to work.
As Mercury clashes with nasty Neptune, you sit at your desk, filling in the hours by frantically searching for the online vampire game (it wasn't that bad after all) while the odious office manager is out to lunch. Perhaps we may learn from all this! Perhaps we may not! Until the next lesson, my tiny little centaur addlepates! Ta! Ta!
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 Aries, the Ram
 Taurus, the Bull
 Gemini, the Twins
 Cancer, the Crab
 Leo, the Lion
 Virgo, the Virgin
 Libra, the Scales
 Scorpio, the Scorpion
 Sagittarius, the Archer
 Capricorn, the Sea Goat
 Aquarius, the Water Bearer
 Pisces, the Fishes
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