Asperitus Casting Runes...
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Salutations, little centaurs! How’s the drinking, carousing, lechery and bullying of smaller creatures going? And are you keeping up with the philosophy in among the various practices of vile brutality and excess for which your sign is justly renowned? There could be no clearer illustration of the true nature of this benighted universe and its rulership by insane gods than the accreditation of your appalling sign with the practice of philosophical wisdom and intellectual accomplishment.
Now we’ve had the compliments, we’d best get on with the vile and bitter prognostications for the month of deleterious December, a month where many of you will be celebrating (in your usual misguided way) what others lament, i.e. the day of your birth. The FULL MOON comes in Gemini and your solar seventh house, causing tension with your nearest and dearest.
As you’re fleeing for your life from the ministrations of the terminator (refer last month’s forecast) and thus beseeching the aid of any or all who once loved you, this tension is not an agreeable thing. Suffice it to say that you do not discover the succour you look for and all doors are shut. However, as nobody actually cares whether you live or die, this doesn’t matter to anyone other than you. A change comes over things though as Venus the goddess moves into your own sign, filling your countenance with light and your manner with a magnetic charm. If your past lovers won’t stand by you, perhaps you can seduce some new creature down the path of pain described by a close emotional bond with your good self. You set off in that direction with vigour. However, as Mercury the messenger and the great Sol Invicti meet and conjoin with underworld Pluto, you end with little for your efforts other than a great deal of argument and the odd death threat to add to the collection already hanging over your head.
When mighty Mars moves into Pisces, your find yourself at a deserted warehouse near the docks in the pouring rain. There you take shelter, miserable and bedraggled specimen that you are. With Chiron the wounded healer now in Capricorn and your solar second house, all the wealth that you did so little actual work to accumulate is now gone and your worst fears about poverty are realized.
But, in the midst of this gloom, come the NEW MOON and a solar eclipse in your sign, plus a meeting between underworld Pluto and Venus the goddess in your sign. Your fortunes change. You find that you’re sharing the warehouse with a beautiful stranger to whom you feel compulsively drawn. The compulsion seems to run both ways as you find yourselves well entwined in the blink of an eye. Then, as the rain pounds on the roof and Mercury the messenger moves into Capricorn, your late night discussions turn to money. You confess that you’re on the run and impoverished. She/he tells of a vast hoard of gold on the ocean floor just waiting to be retrieved. However, her/his lungs are too far gone to let her/him make this one last dive (mighty Mars squaring sober Saturn). You leap to your feet claiming your lungs are as good as anyone’s. You’ll make the dive! Besides, where better to hide from the myrmidons of big business (specifically the terminator) than under the ocean waves.
Without further ado, the plans are laid. As mighty Mars wrestles with underworld Pluto, you sink beneath the waves to find the gold and restore your fortunes. But what’s this? Is a storm arising? Will it threaten your safety? Is your irritating luck to finally come to an end? Are you set to end your days in Davy Jones’ locker? Come back next month and see, little centaurs! And I won’t say: don’t hold your breath.
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Aries, the Ram
Taurus, the Bull
Gemini, the Twins
Cancer, the Crab
Leo, the Lion
Virgo, the Virgin
Libra, the Scales
Scorpio, the Scorpion
Sagittarius, the Archer
Capricorn, the Sea Goat
Aquarius, the Water Bearer
Pisces, the Fishes
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