Astrology on the Web - Scathing Scorpio

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Asperitus Casting Runes...

The Oracle of Bitter Truth for January 2002
SCATHING SCORPIO...

Yikes and good heavens, little scorpion travesties! It's time to talk with your poisonous selves once again! Just wait until I adjust my protective clothing and my psychic shields accordingly. Ah, that's better! Now, I trust the New Year finds you largely unchanged and that the list of those seeking to revenge themselves by killing you is longer than ever. Or perhaps it's the list of the people you'd like to kill in revenge that gets longer each day? I really can't remember! It is so tiresome having to keep up with you denizens of the dark side. No doubt the newly revamped cult of healing and sacred prostitution is flourishing under the tender touch of your merciless excesses. However, if you feel all is going well, little poisonous persons, just watch and wait as jaded January disrupts the course of your otherwise powerful lives. Harken to me, little insect things! Attend to my vile and bitter prognostications!

As we left you last time, you were busy inflicting pain and then relieving it just to see if you could do so. This seemed reasonable to you and predictable to those of us who know you well. As the great Sol Invicti and Venus the goddess wrestle with giant Jupiter, you find that cult matters are proceeding in accordance with your wildest dreams (a frightening thought, considering how wild your dreams actually are). The house of sacred prostitution finds favour with the public and your miraculous healings are nearly ready to be road-tested in the arena of public acclaim. But, as Mercury the messenger moves into the sign of Aquarius and your solar fourth house, there are rumblings from the cellar where you have friends and family imprisoned. Some of them are now screaming continuously, even when you're not inflicting pain on them. Quite unsatisfying, really!

As Mercury conjoins with mystic Neptune, the resultant cacophony is no longer sweet music to your ears. You begin to worry that your little cache of prisoners may be heard from the street. Perhaps some additional soundproofing may do the trick.

In the meantime, the NEW MOON comes in Capricorn and your solar third house and you announce your first appearance as a miracle worker, to be given in a fortnight. As mighty Mars squares the Lunar Nodes, you're busier than ever fleecing your followers for all the cash you can raise through secret sexual profligacy. However, as Mercury then turns retrograde in Aquarius and your solar fourth house and mighty Mars moves into Aries and your solar sixth house, things liven up. Your temple workers fall prey to dissent and aggressive competitiveness as they vie for your favours. The denizens of the cellar begin speaking in tones of delirium or in strange and exotic accents as they start to lose their collective mind in earnest. Their screamings and thrashings are like a demented underworld rhythm section to the melody of discontent from your myrmidons above ground. Honestly, how can you be a proper divinity under circumstances like this, little insectoids! It's as if you're the lord of hell rather than the lord of heaven, isn't it! How tragic and how unfair!

As the FULL MOON comes in Leo and your solar tenth house, opposing a raft of heavenly bodies in odious Aquarius and ushering in the first of your public miraculous healings, you're beset on all sides. As the public streams into the hallowed halls to acclaim you, the cacophony from the cellar rises to fever pitch and the corridors of the Holy of Holies echo with fisticuffs and curses. What will you do, little stings-in-the-tail? Who knows? Who cares! But come back next month for another dose of this drivel anyway!

TIP FOR 2002: Giant Jupiter moves into Leo and your solar tenth house in August of next year, bringing you promotion, fame and success. Just remember! No one who knows the truth about you should be allowed to live.