Asperitus Casting Runes...
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Salutations, little stings in the tail! How is everything in the underworld of your seamy subconscious? Or is that something I'm expected to tell you. After all, as far as you're concerned, there's only one thing worse than not understanding what you think and feel, and that's understanding what you think and feel. This kind of paradox is also your most effective weapon in social interactions as it leaves those who know no better (almost the entire population of the civilized world) powerless to act when you're around, a negotiating position you appreciate greatly when others are in it. Anyway! Enough of these pleasantries! Let's get down to the business at hand, the vile and bitter prognostications for the month of awful April.
After you've finished tying up your friends (so-called) and then threatening to mutilate their pets or razor their favourite pjamas, no doubt you will call 'April Fool's Day' a great success for yet another year. But where does that leave you, little servants of the dark lord? Obviously in some benighted country as a member of the local fire brigade, planning to drink yourself into a state of unconsciousness and live off the welfare benefits that will accrue from of a string of illegitimate children. Now, if you don't know all this, then you haven't been keeping up so kindly read last month's forecast again as a punishment. However, just as we left you, your chickens, or rather the rooster from hell, came home to roost. The spirit of Feedmibeast the First appeared to you, not as a sham and a fiction to serve your greed and desire for power over others, but as a discarnate entity of gruesome proportion and hideous nature. Your delirious fright at this monstrous manifestation knows no bounds, of course, and certainly shows scant respect for the propriety of the bodily functions. Venus the goddess is in Taurus and your solar seventh house, but your newfound friends and associates lie around the floor, dull-witted and insensate with alcohol as we have come to expect from those ruled by the sign of the Bull. Jupiter and Chiron wrestle in the Heavens while Mercury the messenger challenges them from the Aries and you wrestle for control of your consciousness and the mastery of your mortal soul.
However, as Venus the goddess makes a square with mystic Neptune, this awesome spirit transforms itself into a human form of dazzling beauty, female or male depending on your gender and your preferences. As mighty Mars then clashes with revolutionary Uranus, you are thrust, through the dazzling embrace of this creature, into a relationship that is the most electrically charged you have ever known. If this is hell, little stings in the tail, then you'll have more of it!
Come the NEW MOON in Aries in harmony with the Lunar Nodes, you are walking with demons and seeing visions of unprecedented occult power. You realize that your own 'human' cult was just a kindergarten in the face of this university of hidden forces you now attend. Mighty Mars moves into Gemini and you begin weaving the subtle webs of intrigue to muster the subconscious desires of those around you into a gathering head of steam. Mercury the messenger is moving through the sign of Taurus, making tension with mystic Neptune. You begin talking to your comrades about the birth of the true cult and the need to swear fealty to your burgeoning spiritual power through the guiding entity of Feedmibeast the First. Men praise your name and women weep at your feet as Lady Moon conjoins with giant Jupiter while opposing Chiron the wounded healer.
As Venus the goddess squares revolutionary Uranus while the great Sol Invicti moves through Taurus, a circle of close associates gathers to advance your cause. The FULL MOON comes in your sign in square to mystic Neptune and your path is assured. No more fire department and illegitimate children! This is a cult of death and true occult power and you are its spiritual leader. Or are you? Click here next month to see.
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Aries, the Ram
Taurus, the Bull
Gemini, the Twins
Cancer, the Crab
Leo, the Lion
Virgo, the Virgin
Libra, the Scales
Scorpio, the Scorpion
Sagittarius, the Archer
Capricorn, the Sea Goat
Aquarius, the Water Bearer
Pisces, the Fishes
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