Asperitus Casting Runes...
Great gods alive and dead, I’m late with the forecast, wretched insectoids! I must have been attending to matters of import such as sleep or anaesthesia or toenail parings to give way to such a grievous aberration! Certes, it will not happen again, at least not in the next few days anyway! Be assured of that!
So, let us fill the gap created by my dastardly and yet understandable inattention. Vamping Venus will have clashed with underworld Pluto and the Full Moon will have come and gone in nitwit Sagittarius, thus causing strife in the financial department and giving rise to intense responses with regard to intimate matters. Mischievous Mercury will have moved into fatuous Gemini, bringing a few secret discussions into the purview of your loathsome existence.
Now, with that out of the way, we shall pick up the cosmic ball and run with it as vamping Venus eclipses the great Sol Invicti, once again in your solar eighth house. By my little brown bottle, are you insectoids going to spend the rest of your lives in that odious underworld den of iniquity? In all likelihood, yes! Ah well! On with the show!
As I was saying, vamping Venus eclipses, et cetera, et cetera! Now, listen closely, little rulers of the sex organs! The Venus transit is something of a rarity and only an incarnation of yours several lifetimes ago would have been through anything like it before, so I suggest you make the most of it. Have sex! Make money! Develop secret strategies for gaining power over the wealth of others! Inflict cruel and unusual punishments on those who disappoint you. In other words, behave normally!
Ghastly planets and nasty aspects pave the way to a New Moon in lunatic Gemini (gods, will we ever be rid of that unspeakable sign). Thus you forge an alliance in investment bonds and body fluids (classic coin of the scorpion realm) with your renewed romantic interest, the one who works at the healing sanctuary that so recently restored your health. Mischievous Mercury leads the great Sol Invicti into neurotic Cancer, ushering in the Solstice and you’re on the internet, busily investigating such laws and charters as govern the operations of retreats and sanctuaries.
Marauding Mars bullies his way into loathsome Leo and, being recovered, you take employment at the establishment. Lugubrious Saturn clashes with nasty Neptune and the usual shenanigans with whips, chains and electric shock devices find their way into your bedroom life.
As mischievous Mercury conjoins with Saturn, you begin to lay your plans, discussing matters with an elderly spirit guide who has become your constant companion since your last bout with drugs. Vamping Venus goes direct and you’re ready to seize power. Click here next month and learn a dozen different ways to use restraining devices on the infirm. Ta! Ta!