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    TIRESOME TAURUS...

    Go Back  The Irksome Journeys of February 2003    Go Forward
    Salutations, things of horn and hoof! May your thick hide ever be fodder for the boot-makers of the world! This month, a ghastly New Moon in odious Aquarius and your solar tenth house brings a new start in matters of employment (how fascinating that you have found something useful to do). However, this configuration is troubled by mystic Neptune, so you'll probably receive bad advice from a fortune-teller, get caught stealing money from the petty cash or over-indulge your bovine appetites and make yourself late for work. As Mercury the messenger and Venus the goddess trundle through lugubrious Capricorn, your in-laws will arrive to point out your failings while they eat you out of house and home. With giant Jupiter opposing mystic Neptune, one of them (the loud-mouthed academic or actor) will probably move in with his whole family, necessitating that you earn extra money to keep them. You'll end up working increased hours and spend a lot of time arguing with the office manager about the petty cash theft and talking about nothing in particular with work associates.

    When the Full Moon comes in Leo, opposing eccentric Uranus, you will throw your relatives out into the street thereby causing a family feud that sees you cut out of the will. As mighty Mars conjoins with underworld Pluto in Sagittarius, you consult an occultist to put a curse on your family, but decide it's too expensive and go back to eating, drinking and having a lot of sex to suppress your feelings of rage and frustration. As sober Saturn moves forward again and opposes mighty Mars, you're forced to pay the petty cash money back and start legal action to see if you can contest the will. Just another month in your dreary, materialistic lives, my little bovine boofheads!


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    Aries, the Ram
    Aries, the Ram

    Taurus, the Bull
    Taurus, the Bull

    Gemini, the Twins
    Gemini, the Twins

    Cancer, the Crab
    Cancer, the Crab

    Leo, the Lion
    Leo, the Lion

    Virgo, the Virgin
    Virgo, the Virgin

    Libra, the Scales
    Libra, the Scales

    Scorpio, the Scorpion
    Scorpio, the Scorpion

    Sagittarius, the Archer
    Sagittarius, the Archer

    Capricorn, the Sea Goat
    Capricorn, the Sea Goat

    Aquarius, the Water Bearer
    Aquarius, the Water Bearer

    Pisces, the Fishes
    Pisces, the Fishes

     
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