Asperitus Casting Runes...
|
-
Hail to the bawling bovinities! In the coming month, everyone will want to talk to you and bask in the warm glow of your aura. Giant Jupiter, monarch of the Heavens is preparing to move into Cancer and your solar third house, bringing this blessing. There's no explanation for the absurdity of divine favour bestowed upon worthless persons other than to bow our heads and admit to the whimsies of fate in a universe ruled by insane gods. That's more philosophy than either I can bear or you can understand, so I'll come straight to the prognosticating point and forecast your upcoming shenanigans.
You bulls may teeter into July as Venus the goddess makes mayhem with Lady Moon and revolutionary Uranus, putting the perfect cap of instability on top of your glorious rise and equally pathetic fall last month. Partners may be up in arms and work will be in tatters at your feet. However, as long as you can eat, sleep, have sex and work normal hours, you may not notice much of what's going on.
Nevertheless, when the FULL MOON comes in Capricorn and your solar ninth house on July 5th, bringing a lunar eclipse, you're obliged to attend a gathering of your partner's relatives. There you fall out with a clan elder in some ridiculous discussion about the law or politics and are banished to the shadows of family displeasure. But your exile is not to last. When giant Jupiter, monarch of the Heavens and Mercury the messenger conjoin on July 12th and then move into Cancer, a startling offer comes via email. Les E. Rect, your sex therapist persona of last month is to be resurrected by an American media group. The phone rings incessantly. There's talk of six figure sums and a miniseries based on the life of Les, entitled Les E. Rect, the life of a sex therapist (you suggested the title as all of us who know you well can tell). Jupiter, monarch of the Heavens blesses your every word with magnetic glamour, now that he cavorts in your solar third house and you perform before adoring crowds. This is despite the fact that everything you say is still as dull and narrow-minded as it ever has been. It just doesn't seem to be, that's all. They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder. So too may intelligence be in the ear of the listener. Then never were human senses more tragically mistaken than in the coming month, little bulls, but you will be the beneficiary of this extraordinary travesty.
As Venus the goddess meets Saturn, lord of fateful reward on July 15th, you say farewell to your old life. Then, as Lady Moon meets Venus the goddess in Gemini, opposing underworld Pluto, you fall passionately in love with one (or perhaps several) of the new media stars you're meeting and begin a lustful affair with same when mighty Mars goes direct in Sagittarius and your solar eighth house. Come the NEW MOON in Cancer and your solar third house, you're reclining on a houseboat on a river somewhere, thinking creative thoughts (or something fairly like them, for you anyway). You also eat, sleep, have sex and try to work regular hours. In fact, with the great Sol Invicti and Mercury the messenger both in Leo by the end of the month, all you have to worry about is emotional gratification in all of it's most extravagant forms. Ah well! And if all of this good fortune seems too fantastic too be true, don't worry. It is a singularly better prospect than your real life is likely to hold for you, little bulls.
|
Aries, the Ram
Taurus, the Bull
Gemini, the Twins
Cancer, the Crab
Leo, the Lion
Virgo, the Virgin
Libra, the Scales
Scorpio, the Scorpion
Sagittarius, the Archer
Capricorn, the Sea Goat
Aquarius, the Water Bearer
Pisces, the Fishes
|
